Other idiotic Burning Man trips Back to the beginning of this idiotic Burning Man trip Autographed copies of Adventures with the Mojave Phone Booth are now available!

Our booksigning was intended as only one Insurrectionist Tine in a whole anti-Burning Man Spork of Revolution for which we had planned and supplied.

Unfortunately, our eyes were bigger than our Spork this year; our efforts were characterized by a general lethargy. Among the plans we were too slack-ass to carry out:

  • On our pre-BM discussion list, in response to all the rules, I had asked:

    anyone wanna throw in on a little side-prank i was discussing w/max & ted yesterday? we'd wear carrotsuits (orange prison jumpsuits) and manacles & walk around single-file with Red-Guard-inspired placards around our necks, stating our crime and our contrition

    I APOLOGIZE TO MY COMRADES FOR TAKING PHOTOGRAPHS WITH AN UNREGISTERED CAMERA

    I CONFESS MY USE OF TIKI TORCHES

    I ABUSED MYSELF IN PUBLIC

    oops, sorry, that last one was for whoever wears the pee wee herman costume

    Krishna rounded up the carrotsuits for us, and -- BONUS! -- they even had words such as "PERVERT" and "SEX OFFENDER" stenciled on their backs.

    Krishna brought the suits to the playa, and had made some placards. I brought lots of supplies for signs...

    ... and we still didn't manage to get off our asses & do it.

    Weeeeeeee suuuuuuuuuuuuck.

  • The Welcome to Burning Man Cop Sign

    This assembled puzzle, indoctrination for kids, was supposed to be a greeting sign to give people an idea what to expect at The New Burning Man. I figured we'd put it near the front entrance, or take it on Postal rounds or something. Y'know ... "WELCOME TO BURNING MAN -- ASSUME THE POSITION!"

    I brought the sign. But didn't do anything with it. Why? No answer.

Other things did get done, though. Mister Cardhouse wrote to the list:
"Deuce came up with this one. I am talking to an unnamed chemist to get a paragraph or two about this sulfate core business."
The chemist must have approved, because the flyers did make their way to strategic points in the Burning Man infrastructure.

(It's good to use the word infrastructure, is what I gather from the suits these days.)


(Click for larger image)


(Click for image that might actually be of some use.)
 This flyer was submitted by Ted Casino. Wotta card.

Let's see, what else went on ... Dr. Cliff, Evil Dentist (the reason dental rhymes with mental), had made up an official-looking BM questionnaire and also some surveillance stickers for the porta-jons. And I think maybe Cupcake and Max mounted some surveillance cameras in various places, not sure. My attention span was very short this year.

Also, Burning Man 99 saw the final, glorious rounds of the Disgruntled Postal Workers.

R.I.P.D.P.W.