Deuce of Clubs Book Club: Books of the Weak

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I'm a Lebowski, You're a Lebowski

Guy Debord: Revolutionary

No Place to Hide

Command of Office

The Christ-Myth Theory And Its Problems

The Christian Delusion

Lincoln's Wrath

How to Do Nothing with Nobody All Alone by Yourself

The Sexy Book of Sexy Sex

Bossypants

Zombie Spaceship Wasteland

Catching the Big Fish

Dig Infinity

The True Adventures of the Rolling Stones

Crazy for God

Basin and Range

Anarchy Evolution

The File

John Ringo

The Supremes

End the Fed

Burning Book

The Hohokam Millenium

God's Middle Finger

Narcocorrido

In Heaven Everything Is Fine

The Shunning

Wisdom Sits in Places

The Marvelous Country

Hamilton's Curse

The Secret Life of Houdini

The Trouble with Being Born

Schulz and Peanuts

First Into Nagasaki

Joe Miller's Jests

Human Smoke

Dirty Tricks Cops Use

A Futile and Stupid Gesture

All For A Few Perfect Waves

Systemantics

Death in the Desert

American Signs

Secret Proceedings and Debates of the Constitutional Convention

Secrets Of A Stingy Scoundrel

The Self-Made Tapestry

A Constitutional History of Secession

The Neurotic's Notebook

Interrogation Machine

Monster Midway

The Harlot by the Side of the Road

Forced Into Glory

Imperial Life in the Emerald City

J. G. Ballard: Quotes

The Compleat Practical Joker

Laugh with Hugh Troy

Pranks!

A Liar's Autobiography

Cobb

Chasing Rainbows

Letters from Tucson, 1925-1927

The Five Fosters

The Giant Cactus Forest and Its World

How to Cheat Your Friends at Poker

World Famous Cults & Fanatics

That's Not All, Folks!

God's Problem

Will Christ Return By 1988?

Fragments of an Anarchist Anthropology

The Whiskey Rebellion

FDR's Folly

Wilson's War

Bully Boy

[If] I Did It

The Dark Side

Secret Origins of the Bible

Godless

The End of Faith

Why I Became An Atheist

"Life's Calendar for 1922"

Churchill, Hitler, and the Unnecessary War

The Negro Cowboys

EXPECT RESISTANCE

Monty Python Speaks

Baseball Between the Numbers

The Psychopath's Bible

Satisfaction

J. G. Ballard: Conversations

Days of War, Nights of Love

Gospel Fictions and Who Wrote the Gospels?

The Real Deadwood

Deadwood

The Revolution: A Manifesto

45

The Secret Man

Stormin' Mormon

From Psyche to Soma

I'll Gather My Geese

The Osama bin Laden I Know

Alias "Paine"

A Man Without Words

The Wild Trees

The World Without Us

Arizona's Changing Rivers

The Phoenix Indian School

Realm of the Long Eyes

John Dillinger: The Life and Death of America's First Celebrity Criminal

Buckey O'Neill: The Story of a Rough Rider

Thanks For Tuning In

Adventures in the Apache Country

Waylon: An Autobiography

My Life: Sunrise to Sunset

Mimes and Miners: A Historical Study of the Theater in Tombstone

The First 100 Years: A History of Arizona Blacks

Enter Without Knocking

City in the Sun: The Japanese Concentration Camp at Poston, Arizona

House by the Buckeye Road

Vanished Arizona

The Big Con

The Astronomy Cafe and Back to the Astronomy Cafe

A Handbook on Hanging

The Sinner's Guide to the Evangelical Right

A Mind Restored

Mr. Show: What Happened?!

Reclaiming the American Revolution

Stumbling On Happiness

Treasure Maps of the Superstitions

Sunny Slope

Did Genesis Man Conquer Space?

Look Homeward, America

Radicals for Capitalism

Kayaker's Little Book of Wisdom

God Is Not Great

The Echoing Green

The Secret Life of the Lonely Doll

K Foundation Burn a Million Quid

The Facts of Life and Other Dirty Jokes and The Tao of Willie

Just Six Numbers and Our Cosmic Habitat

Wild Goose Chronicles

Behind Bars: Surviving Prison

Silent Night: The Story of the World War I Christmas Truce

The Gang They Couldn't Catch

Manhunt

A History of the End of the World

Al Sieber: Chief of Scouts

Apaches & Longhorns

Deep Survival

Captured

DINO

Sock

Bo: Pitching & Wooing

You Are Worthless

You And Your Hand

Access All Areas

Field Guide to the Apocalypse

The War on Terrorism

Those Idiots From Earth

September 11: An Oral History

Mortal Questions

The Heresy of Self-Love

The White Flag Principle

Medieval Panorama

An Honest President

Those Words

À rebours

Peterson's Incident Report Book

Boo! Culture, Experience, and the Startle Reflex

Victory Denied

Nothing, Arizona

A Porcine History of Philosophy and Religion

O Holy Cow!: The Selected Verse of Phil Rizzuto

DOME COMPENDIUM OF TOPICAL TREATMENT IN PROCTOLOGY

¿Hablas conmigo

Thirty-three Candles

Black Monk Time

Men of Distinction

Alexander the Corrector

Space Viking

Mark These Men

Hallucinogenic Plants

Prohibition: An Adventure in Freedom

JESUS! He's Our President

LOVE

How to Watch Football on Television

Merrill Markoe's Guide to Love

Lincoln: The Man and The Car

Whatever Men Know About Women

Biographies of Italian War Heroes

ABC of Espionage

Art Colony Perverts

Devil-ution

Starting Right with Bees

Planet Earth is a Cult

Baseball Letters

Fetish

Dopey Doings

Democracy: The God That Failed

Handgrenade Talk

Hi, How Are You?

het zingen van het ijs

The Museum of Jurassic Technology Jubilee Catalogue

The Rector and the Rogue

Colorful Cacti of the American Deserts

Odd Jobs: The World of Deviant Work

The Hungry Man's Outdoor Grill Cookbook

How to Get Invited to the White House

How to Work for a Jerk

Never Work for a Jerk!

The Mentality of Apes

Your Vigor for Life Appalls Me

Dr. Strange: Sorceror Supreme

Nautical Notions for Nibbling

A Short Introduction to the History of Human Stupidity

The Fake Revolt

Coup D'Etat

History of the Town of Felicity

Hood of Death

Dolls' House Bathrooms: Lots of Little Loos

Border Security / Anti-Infiltration Operations

Living on Light

God is for Real, Man

Did the Apostle Paul Visit Britain?

Twin Peaks

2001

Power Phrases

The Truth About Wagner

The Life of the Bee

Tombstone

Science Looks at Smoking

The Chiricahuas

The New Dark Ages Conspiracy

The Big Question

Everybody's Book of Epitaphs

The Death of the Fuhrer

Mindfuckers

Gorbachev! Has the Real Antichrist Come?

The World's Worst Poet

Alyssa Milano: She's the Boss

Home is the Desert

Nine Lives: From Stripper to Schoolteacher

How to Start Your Own Country

How to Found Your Own Religion

Sex Objects in the Sky

Indian Oratory

Bastard Without Portfolio

The Bedside Book of Bastards

Hopeless -- Yet There Is Hope

Bible in Pocket, Gun in Hand

Margie Asks WHY

Death of a Hippie

Wake Up or Blow Up

Feeling and Form

Guilt

A Mile in His Moccasins

Mojave Desert Ramblings

Passing of the Outhouse

This Way to Happiness

The Happy Life

Young Only Once

The Monkey Gland Affair

Bert Bacharach's Book for Men

The Two Babylons

For Good and Evil: The Impact of Taxes...

Why Christians Crack Up!

Why Do Christians Break Down?

Hava Nagila!

Beethoven or Bust

How to Abandon Ship

Livin' in Joe's World

The Last Democrat

Salvation Mountain

The Varmint and Crow Hunter's Bible

Love in the Western World

Jack the Ripper: Light-Hearted Friend

Little Men of the NFL

No One May Ever Have The Same Knowledge Again

The Secret Museum of Mankind

James Bond's World of Values

We Did Not Plummet Into Space

The Boy Who Didn't Believe IN CHRISTMAS

The Great Escape From Your Dead-End Job

All About Tipping

My Loser Godfrey

A Haircut in Horse Town

Mucusless Diet Healing System

Jefferson Returns

Lincoln Returns

Churchill Returns

Corporation Freak

Null Bock auf DDR

So You're Going on a Mission?

Nudes in My Camera

Why I Hate the Nazis

Flesh, Metal & Glass

The James Beard Cookbook

Mortal Refrains

Deadbolt

Amy Grant: A Biography

The X Cars

We Were Five

Mr. Wilson's Cabinet of Wonder

Hello ... Wrong Number

I'll Kill You Next!

Murder in Vegas

Did MAN Just Happen?

Terror at the Atlanta Olympics

Criswell Predicts

Your Next Ten Years

They Pay Me to Catch Footballs

The Phantom Menace

Just For Fellows

The Lopsided Gal

Astrology and Horse Racing

The Cokesbury Stunt Book

The Origin of Things

Remarks on the History of Things

U.S. Government Sewing Book

Funeral Tributes II

Blinky, the Friendly Hen

The Serbs Choose War

My Mystery Castle

Iggy

Funeral Customs the World Over

The Right to be Let Alone

Mormonism and the Negro

The Church and the Negro

Preacher with a Billy Club

Fighting Parson of the Old West

Invisibility: Mastering the Art of Vanishing

How to Disappear Completely

The Gentle Art of Making Enemies

How to Catch a Man, How to Keep a Man, How to Get Rid of a Man

Langenscheidts Konversationsbuch

Marlene Dietrich's ABC

The Bible in the Hands of Its Creators


The Neurotic's Notebook

Mignon McLaughlin (1963)

 

No one has ever loved anyone the way everyone wants to be loved.

When we have been humiliated by someone we love, it takes all our strength to pretend to recover from it.

When a man comes to love a woman exactly as she had dreamed, she decides he is a weakling.

It is a feeling at once stimulating and flat, to know that someone you do not love is in love with you.

What we love about love is the fever, which marriage puts to bed and cures.

How can a man marry wisely in his twenties? The girl he's going to wind up wanting hasn't even been born.

Love is the silent saying and saying of a single name.

If you made a list of the reasons why any couple got married, and another list of the reasons for their divorce, you'd have a hell of a lot of overlapping.

No one can understand love who has not experienced infatuation. And no one can understand infatuation, no matter how many times he has experienced it.

Insult, not flattery, is the great aphrodisiac.

When we first fall in love, we feel that we know all there is to know about life, and perhaps we are right.

If he suddenly falls in love with someone else, a husband may not start wanting a divorce; but if he suddenly makes a lot of money, he usually will.

"I am as I am" is another way of saying "I can do without your love."

If the second marriage really succeeds, the first one didn't really fail.

Between two married couples there are five possibilities for friendship: man to man, woman to woman, each man to the woman not his wife, and couple to couple. It's seldom that more than two of these will actually materialize.

The marriage of convenience has this to recommend it: we are better judges of convenience than we are of love.

Boredom is often the cause of promiscuity and always its result.

We all dream of being the darling of everybody's darling.

He's in for trouble—the man whose wife is detested by all women and desired by all men.

Beauty often fades, but seldom so swiftly as the joy it gives us.

The hardest-learned lesson: that people have only their kind of love to give, not our kind.

If you had an unhappy childhood, you will always want to sleep late in the morning.

When children are bored, it reflects on us all.

A childhood can be judged sheltered or not according to which was learned first, the four-letter word or the euphemism.

There are children born to be children, and others who must mark time till they can take their natural places as adults.

We tell our children things which we know are not so, but which we wish were so.

One of life's few really reliable pleasures: to have a family you love, and to leave them for a week.

The family unit is man's noblest device for being bored.

The fault no child ever loses is the one he was most punished for.

Groups of girls are pretty, or not; they are seldom mixed.

Men prefer brief praise, pitched high; women are satisfied with praise in a lower key, just so it goes on and on.

Desire is in men a hunger, in women only an appetite.

An attractive woman likes feminine company until she's twenty, and after she's twenty-five.

Others follow patterns; we alone are unpredictable.

A young woman can live off the folly of men; a man of any age can live off the folly of women.

It upsets women to be, or not to be, stared at hungrily.

When a woman reaches forty, she must wait twenty years for her husband to catch up.

Most women would like to dress imaginatively, but they glare at any woman who does.

The total history of almost anyone would shock almost everyone.

Being Irish is, no matter how real, a pose.

On stage and off, we care what happens to a beautiful woman, whether she can act well or not.

Any woman can talk herself into being in love with any man, for a while anyway.

The mark of the neurotic: to imagine that you're the only one who cares deeply for anything.

Even cowards can endure hardship; only the brave can endure suspense.

Women gather together to wear silly hats, eat dainty food, and forget how unresponsive their husbands are. Men gather to talk sports, eat heavy food, and forget how demanding their wives are. Only where children gather is there any real chance of fun.

People who won't have a TV set in their house get more pleasure from their refusal than most of us get from TV.

We come late, if at all, to wine and philosophy; whiskey and action are easier.

Men feel that women somehow drag them down, and women feel that way about men. It's possible that are right.

We work for praise, and dawdle once we have it.

The fault we admit to is seldom the fault we have, but it has a certain relationship to it, a somewhat similar shape, like that of a sleeve to an arm.

You will turn over many a futile new leaf till you learn we must all write on scratched-out pages.

Irrelevant things may happen to you, but once they have happened they all become relevant.

If you can tell anyone about it, it's not the worst thing you ever did.

Many things can make you miserable for weeks; few can bring you a whole day of happiness.

The chief reason for drinking is the desire to behave in a certain way, and to be able to blame it on alcohol.

Air that has been much quarreled in becomes very hard to breathe.

The best work is done with the heart breaking, or overflowing.

Every day of our lives we are on the verge of making those changes that would make all the difference.

Nostalgia for what we have lost is more bearable than nostalgia for what we have never had, for the first involves knowledge and pleasure, the second only ignorance and pain.

I do not trust those who are above name-dropping. The suppression of small vices always exacts too high a toll.

If the pain wanders, do not waste your time with doctors.

An old racetrack joke reminds you that your program contains all the winners' names. I stare at my typewriter keys with the same thought.

We hear only half of what is said to us, understand only half of that, believe only half of that, and remember only half of that.

Oh what a tangled web we weave when first we practice to weave.

What you have become is the price you paid to get what you used to want.

Every group of six or more has its inner circle, its outer circle, and its hangers-on.

We waste a lot of time running after people we could have caught by just standing still.

Bored with your present enemies? Make new ones! Tell two of your women friends that they look alike.

When a stranger identifies you from a friend's description, it's just as well you didn't hear the description.

Injure a businessman and he'll try to make you sorry; injure an artist and he'll try to make you immortal.

Every society honors its live conformists and its dead troublemakers.

Sooner or later, they govern who are determined to.

In the theatre, as in life, we prefer a villain with a sense of humor to a hero without one.

There's little enough to be said for nationalism, so let's say it and have done.

Broadway audiences are dependably square. "Well, I'll be a son of a bitch" always gets a laugh; spoken by a little old lady, it brings down the house.

Life's most painful condition: to be almost a celebrity.

Everybody can write; writers can't do anything else.

Theatre audiences can't be made to think and cry: at best, they can be made to think and laugh, or to feel and cry.

A critic can only review the book he has read, not the one which the writer wrote.

We have to call it "freedom": who'd die for "a lesser tyranny"?

Charity is a good way of reminding God that if we can do it, He can.

Despair is anger with no place to go.

In church, sacred music would make believers of us all—but preachers can be counted on to restore the balance.

Those who turn to God for comfort may find comfort but I do not think they will find God.

We climb mountains because they are there, and worship God because He is not.

If everyone gave a tenth of his worldly goods to the person he most admired, the rich would just get richer.

Anything you do from the heart enriches you, but sometimes not till years later.

An artist is a socially unattractive person whom socially attractive people make money out of.

The poor have the same basic pleasures as the rich, and the rich will always resent it.

Money is the best counterfeit money.

In retrospect, our triumphs could as easily have happened to someone else; but our defeats are uniquely our own.

One day you are an apprentice, and everybody's pet; the next, you are coldly expected to deliver. There is never sufficient warning that the second day is coming.

Between a man and a woman both aged fifty there are two full generations, for she might well wed a man in his seventies, and he a girl of twenty.

I have seen messed-up people of forty who still seemed salvageable, and children of six or seven who almost surely were not.

In every group of intimidated people, each thinks "I will rebel," but each waits for the others.

Mumps, measles, and puppy love are terrible after twenty.

My thoughts, I guess, are bitter; who but the bitter have thoughts?

The past is rich in lessons from which we would greatly profit except that the present is always so full of Special Circumstances.

There are whole years for which I hope I'll never have to be cross-examined, for I could not give an alibi.

We sometimes feel that we have been really understood, but it was always long ago, by someone now dead.

How strange that the young should always think the world is against them—when in fact that is the only time it is for them.

What you were sure of yesterday, you know now to be false, but what you are sure of today is absolutely true.


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